The North Face black hole: Where do they go?
Sam Kello
Issue date: 3/16/05 Section: Distractions
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Someone somewhere has a traveling retail store of North Face jackets in the trunk of their car. Either that or the nearest black hole to the Milky Way galaxy is getting infinitely bigger.
For some reason I browse through campus notices usually a few times a week. Perhaps it's the hope that someone will actually say something funny, or maybe it's because I forget about campus events all the time and a need a reminder. On my quest I noticed a developing pattern of campus notices regarding lost North Face jackets.
After researching the subject further, I estimate that on average there are 10 campus notices during each cold month regarding a lost black/blue North Face jacket, and in the majority of cases it also reads "lost at Pole House 3" or "North Pole."
In the more humorous cases, I found that a few people lost their jacket on more than one occasion. Did they ever get the first one back, or did they buy a new one? This question plagues me every night as I fall asleep.
I believe to understand the inner workings of my mind it is necessary to see what I see. What follows is a list of the notices from March, slightly edited to protect the names of the innocent.
March 1 - "Found a blue and black North Face fleece, size men's large in a Payne classroom last week."
March 2 - "Whoever took my fleece (black North Face) from the gym on Monday, thank you so much for taking my cell phone and swipe card out of the pocket because I really needed them. I really appreciate it. But if you decide that you don't want my fleece anymore, I would really, really, really like it back because it's really cold outside and I like it, which is why I bought it. So just in case, could you please email me LostNorthFace@wlu.edu or just bring it by graham lees XXX, because I would love to get it back. Thanks!"
March 4 - "I lost a gray and black north face fleece at Amityville Friday night. It has an Olympus digital camera in the pocket. If you have
For some reason I browse through campus notices usually a few times a week. Perhaps it's the hope that someone will actually say something funny, or maybe it's because I forget about campus events all the time and a need a reminder. On my quest I noticed a developing pattern of campus notices regarding lost North Face jackets.
After researching the subject further, I estimate that on average there are 10 campus notices during each cold month regarding a lost black/blue North Face jacket, and in the majority of cases it also reads "lost at Pole House 3" or "North Pole."
In the more humorous cases, I found that a few people lost their jacket on more than one occasion. Did they ever get the first one back, or did they buy a new one? This question plagues me every night as I fall asleep.
I believe to understand the inner workings of my mind it is necessary to see what I see. What follows is a list of the notices from March, slightly edited to protect the names of the innocent.
March 1 - "Found a blue and black North Face fleece, size men's large in a Payne classroom last week."
March 2 - "Whoever took my fleece (black North Face) from the gym on Monday, thank you so much for taking my cell phone and swipe card out of the pocket because I really needed them. I really appreciate it. But if you decide that you don't want my fleece anymore, I would really, really, really like it back because it's really cold outside and I like it, which is why I bought it. So just in case, could you please email me LostNorthFace@wlu.edu or just bring it by graham lees XXX, because I would love to get it back. Thanks!"
March 4 - "I lost a gray and black north face fleece at Amityville Friday night. It has an Olympus digital camera in the pocket. If you have